The Constant War

Because I tend to look “normal” it is difficult for some people to accept that I fight against my body everyday.  Most days I just take a little longer to complete a task, but at times, getting upright is a battle that I can’t win.  This past Wednesday I had to go to the Psychologist for my disability determination.  I woke up to a familiar stabbing pain that the base of my neck.  My brain was (again!) trying to carry out it’s escape plan.  The pain was enough to give me dark circles under my eyes, a poor outlook on the day, and I had to pee so much (a typical symptom for me).  I went with my sister and my mom and explained  to a complete stranger my illness, its unpleasant side effects, and how it has affected my life.  It was an overwhelming hour.  I think she got a good idea of how Chiari messes with your mind/memory/focus/concentration.  Everyday, I wake up on the battlefield of life, fighting myself to save myself.

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